05-20-12 Anti-social
I don’t know if I ever said anything about this but I don’t many friends. And looking back I feel like I’ve never really had a real best friend. I’ve had friends, people who say there my best friends but I don’t think I’ve truly had a best friend. Expect maybe one in like the 3rd-4th grade I’m also very anti-social, and the reason why I think so is because I’ve tried it. I’ve tried making friends. I’ve tried going to parties and you know it was just never really that good. I guess maybe there little things that hurt inside or make me mad like when I’m interrupted when I’m talking or when I want to say something and no one cares or listens. I feel like I’ve been treated so badly by kids and people my whole life it just hurts and it’s made me afraid of seeing other people now it’s like I try to much sure and really see who my real friends are. And I barely can now. My only real friends I have are my boyfriend, Teren, my cousin Phil and josh. That’s another thing I wanna talk about guy friends. It’s true that one of you will like each other sometime possibly I mean sometimes it’s not so bad. Teren and I weren’t friends that long until we got together. Maybe a month. But with him it was like I just knew from talking to him. And josh did like me a few months ago but now we decided that we would just be friends and he now works with teren and teren knows but they get along fine. But still guy friends are better than girlfriends because with guys they don’t have a fit and up and forget your friendship. They really don’t care about stupid stuff while I’ve had great girlfriends and then its ends over something so trivial. But I just really want a girlfriend to talk to things that are incredibly stupid.
05-12-2012 ugh
I’m starting to kind of hate the way my job works. I just hate the days I’m always working (Tues. weds. Fri. sat.) I don’t mind Tuesday and wedsnday, but I hate working Saturday more than anything in the world. Most of everything I ever get invited to is on a Saturday plus it’s the weekend and I want to be able to do things on the weekend. My dream work would be Tuesday Wedsday Thursday and Friday. But again this is just a dream. It will be at least 4 more years until I get out of college. And then there’s my whole headband selling plan. Hoping that will work. Because that’s sort of a dream of mine to do. And then there’s this whole summer, which I have plans for like going to worlds of fun, Oceans of fun, the Zoo, the drive In, a picnic, there’s more it’s just that I’m afraid that there’s no way I can do this all and work. And I’m scared of asking for days off because A) My boss Mary scares, But then again I just have to write it on paper sometimes B) It makes me feel like I’m not a hard worker C) I don’t like how they have to know why you want the day off. I feel like it’s none of their business. I asked for more hours but nothing major, like starting work at 3 or 2 instead of 4 because my parents have been whining to me like crazy to get more hours or have another job. Which is completely idiotic. My mom seems to think that I should work day and night nonstop. My boyfriend’s friend works from 8 in the morning to midnight!?! When the hell does this kid sleep!?!?! Or Eat or have any free time at all!?!?!?!?! I couldn’t do that no way. Like having a 9-5 mon-fri would not bother me. In the future not now. I kind of enjoy closing because I like doing all the cleaning all around the store.
the 5. worst pieces of advice you can give someone.
5. When Your on a first date with a guy, Talk about marrige, how many babies you want, and your most embearssing period stories.
4. If everyone else Is doing somthing, you should to.
3. WHEN YOUR MAD, TALK IN ALL CAPS SO PEOPLE WILL TAKE YOU SEROISLY ONLINE
2. You can trust everyone
1. drink the bleach, its good for you!
Things I love about tumlbr!
1. Its like my diary
2. I like finding people who I didn’t think liked the same stuff as me
3. I can say what every I want on here unlike facebook were my dad and people from church are on
4. The things I see on here are unlike anywere unless you can go online
5. I don’t have to see any annoying things like “Share this If you wish cancer never existed (If you don’t you must have no heart)” Really? My grandmother died of colon cancer when I was 13 of course I wish it never existed! So your telling me I have to prove that I care or I’m against something by sharing a photo!?
04-30/2012 Happy birthday Rainyn!
Just had dinner with my boyfriend and his family at steak and shake. I’m starting to think that my stomach is getting smaller because I eat less and I get full easier than I used to. But still the food was really good. I had a burger, fries, and a shake. Then we went to one of his family members house and they talked and then they took me home. It was for his little sister Rainyns 2 ND birthday. Also we have been together for a year and a half today, which scares me. I love teren, so much but right now thinking about how long we’ve been together, I’m afraid what if my feelings become stronger and stronger and then my feelings get hurt i we break up? Maybe I’m over thinking, which I usually do. This weekend off work was … OK. We all fought a lot but still I enjoyed the garage sale. Sophia earned the most money, But what whatever. And Then yesterday we all went to the Titanic show which was great. Me and Sophia were joking with each other the entire time. We saw a sign that was upside down by mistake and It was a walking sign and I said, “Look you can walk upside down here!” I joked and me and Sophia were just laughing and she took a picture, when we first walked in they were playing my heart will go on from the movie, really? then we all got cards of different people who really were on the ship and we found out If they died at the end. All of ours lived. We saw a ton of things on display and they showed what the first class, second class, and third class has in there rooms. My favorite thing probably in the whole thing was they had a big iceberg, (Which was not the real size of it by the way) and you could touch it and it was real ice and everything. They even had hand prints in the ice to represent the people clawing on to the ice to live. afterword we saw the tourist shop and then ate at this great Mongolian BBQ were you pick out you food and watch them cook it. Then I returned my ear buds and got these great new ones and great nail polish. I’d say this was a great weekend.
04-26-2012
My mother is a hypocrite, Telling me that I’m did this at the last minute when shes the one who didn’t even tag any of her stuff when I’m the one who did it all last night before she even did anything and I have been preparing all week get stuff every day when she’s just now get stuff! Or how last night when all I want to do is get movies and and DVDs that we don’t want anymore then she has this whole Bitch fit with me about it. then today at the garage sale when A man asked if we had any VHS’s she told us to get them And I’m just thinking Fuck no I’m not getting them not after last night with you asking like a cunt about the whole thing so my dad got them instead. When at first it wasn’t even my idea, It was my fucking sisters idea! Then My dad gets mad that were fighting and has a bitch fit about it. Today has been not so good with all the tension and now my sister is being a bitch with me and I would like to slam her face in the concrete. I just want to get away from them. Its time like this when I wish I could move out and never see them again but then I think were am I supposed to live? I’m 19 and I now I could move out but I couldn’t afford it right now =(. Its like the blog I wrote a few weeks ago were I said that I feel like I’m stuck. I can’t leave even If I wanted to at the moment. And I do.
if I had these and had you over for dinner I would basically prance around the dining table asking if you needed salt or pepper.
I WOULD NOT LEAVE YOU ALONE UNTIL YOU SAY YES
(Source: snoipahkat, via liviebrookes)
04-15-12 miss dates
04-15-12 funny, I don’t recall asking for your opinion
So the other day My boyfreinds little sister wrote on one of my facebook pictures you have a unibrow. What was with her? I mean, who takes the time to just insult random people when I’ve done nothing to you! I never asked for your opinion on me? Also She added “Not to be mean”. Yea, because Added “Not to be mean” it makes what you say less rude or less of a bitch. It’s just been bugging me ever since it happened. I deleted her comment but it still hurts. I know that My eyebrows can be a little bushy at times, but I get them waxed every now and then and I just bought this thing to groom them. Plus I have light skin and very dark hair, so it makes look worse. I’ve been teased about it my entire life plus because my dark hair I also have vary noticeable peach fuzz. The good news is now I take care of it with stuff unlike when I was a kid. But still I have to admit It was a little bad in the picture but that doesn’t give her the right to do that. But then Today I was In church I thought to myself Why am I letting this little teenage girl make me feel insecure? I know that I have a bit of a uni-brow when I don’t fix it, And I know that I’m beautiful, And by the way, so does her brother. So really, I’m just gonna let this go. But I think I might talk to her about it.
